The Fitness Ninja

I’m sick today.  Not good as this will probably stall my P90x / Insanity hybrid program.  Just congested and “mucous-y” with a small headache.  I’m taking meds so hopefully it will blow over in a few days and, most importantly, I pray to God the baby doesn’t get sick.  On top of his teething that would truly be hellish.  So today, I am taking a true rest day.  I called in sick to work and will just recuperate, lie down, sleep maybe read a bit and watch some tv, drink juice and eat fruit.

Yesterday I completed the last day of my recovery week with my modified Yoga X.  Felt good and I was pretty relaxed afterwards.  Nailed most of the balance poses and didn’t find it overly difficult like I do on some days.  Despite that the wife and I got into a spat over some silly things.  I honestly think we’re a little more on edge now what with this job dilemma and Eli teething and being pretty unrestful quite a bit.  Neither one of us gets much rest and that makes for sensitivity issues.  It’s probably just me though as Colleen is pretty understanding almost all of the time with my quirks.  I have to be more supportive and caring because really I think she is taking the brunt of caring for Eli as I am at work for several hours of the day.

Also, it’s not good being angry all the time.  I think I’ve always had an issue with my temper.  Partly because a) I’m ultra competitive and b) it has actually helped me succeed in certain aspects of life.  See, I am what you would call a categorical type A personality.  When I set my mind to complete something, no matter how I am feeling, I have to get it done.  I’m compulsive that way with tasks.  It’s probably the reason I’ve been able to stay on top of all this exercise (I wish I could apply the same drive to nutrition).  It’s the reason why I succeeded at school (that and my parents putting a really high premium on education).  When I meet with a stumbling block I feel like I can’t solve it frustrates and angers me to no end.  It’s even more frustrating when despite how much hard work and effort I put towards something, it feels like it can’t get resolved.  Colleen is kind of the opposite in that she is a type B personality.  When she can’t get something to work, she chills out and looks for something else or just forgets about it altogether if it’s not that important.  I wish I could have that mindset as it would have saved me tons of aggravation over the years.

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And now, on to something totally unrelated (well, maybe a little related…):

In order to relax and get some down time from all this drama at work, I’ve picked up Super Street Fighter 4 for the Playstation 3.  I love Street Fighter as a kid and my brother and I played it to death, for hours and hours upon end in our free time.  We became pretty good at it (my brother’s always had a more natural talent for it than me).  Seeing this new iteration, I’ve tried picking up the game again and relearning it.  Know what I found out?

I suck.  Horribly.

Yeah, yeah.  I know.  With all the other crazy things going on in my life, why am I getting hung up on a video game.  I think it’s because this game represents so much of my youth.  I grew up with it as a central focus in my relationship with my brother and our friends and relatives.  Growing up Asian in the 80s and 90s you couldn’t NOT play Street Fighter.  It was part of the cultural DNA.  Small mini-tournaments would spring up during family gatherings and it would BE TERRIFIC.  Kids would hand off the controller whenever they lost a match to the next challenger, people would cry ‘cheap!’ at perceived injustices, yelling matches would ensue, hearts and egos would be torn then mended.  Epic stuff!

I still remember my friends and I would bike out to the nearest arcade (remember those?) on Friday nights just to play in some dingy, smoke filled room for hours, plunking quarters into machines where not even all the buttons worked but you did the best you could with what did work because we were all so enthralled by this virtual pit fight.

In a nutshell, Street Fighter was my youth.  Other kids had baseball or hockey or basketball.  Our circle of friends had Street Fighter.

So over the past week I’ve revisited this world.  The boon of all this new technology is that despite the arcade being dead, the online world is thriving.  It may not be a perfect replica (i.e. no cigarette smoke, broken controllers or trash talking face to face) but it’s terrific in that you can face competitors all over the world.  Really good competitors.

Actually, I don’t know if they’re “really good”.  I just know I suck.  My execution is horrible and I don’t know the spacing / timing game anymore.  SF was a science and I’ve forgotten most of it.  And… my reflexes stink.

Why am I telling you this? I dunno really.  Remember how I said I was ultra-competitive?  That aspect of me is 1,000,000% true especially with SF.  It just stings to return to it now knowing I don’t “have it anymore”.  I love games and gaming.  It will always be a part of my life.  But in many ways, I think because of age and other commitments (rightfully so as I am an adult now), I have to let this bit of my “youth” go.  It sounds a bit melodramatic but I don’t how else to put it.  It really leaves me hollow inside.  But the game now aggravates me more than it makes me happy.  And that’s not the purpose of a game is it? Especially one you are looking to in order to help you forget the stresses of real life.

I’m sure I would feel the same way about Starcraft 2 though not as intensely as that wasn’t my first true love.

Maybe I should just start paying Farmville?

F*ck that.

It felt good to write this down.  It’s one thing to know you’re aging, quite another to get such a hard, concrete-evidence-in-your-face example that you’re not the person you used to be.

I was so much better at this in my youth.

Time to move on from this too I guess.

Peace.

One last thing, I found this clip on a blog I’ve recently started following. It spoke to me.  Now I have to go see the whole movie .